FILE UNDER: Old School Funk for the True Funk Soldiers.
Scan ahead to the two minute mark and act like you know.
I know, I know, seeking the whereabouts of this dance is like sitting back and wondering what happened to "the butterfly" and "doin' the bounce", but earlier today, while listening to Spank Rock's YoYoYoYoYo, I found myself wondering what happened to the Harlem Shake? And why in 2008, have I yet to master the goddamn move?
Monday, March 17, 2008
Sunday, March 16, 2008
Who you gonna call?
FILE UNDER: A Moment of Clarity/PRIMARIES: So Fucking Disco!
It's 3 a.m. on a Monday morning, and you're [rightfully] passed the fuck out. But you know who isn't? Hillary Clinton. Why? Cause she's out there patrolling these streets, and keeping shit on lock. Who could ask for anything more?
Earlier...
Back in Black.
It's 3 a.m. on a Monday morning, and you're [rightfully] passed the fuck out. But you know who isn't? Hillary Clinton. Why? Cause she's out there patrolling these streets, and keeping shit on lock. Who could ask for anything more?
Earlier...
Fly. Like a bird.
"Did you see Mariah Carey on SNL last night? She looked like one of those Real Housewives of Orange County. Like the cool young mom that comes in and goes "Hey girls, what's going on 2- NI - TAH!?
The Reason.
Reason #1,257,099 why hip-hop's answer to Guns and Roses' Chinese Democracy, Detox, may never see the light of day:
"I just wanna fuckwitchu, on the sneak tip, on some creep shit, so whatcha gon' do, ya freak bitch?
It's main architect, Dr. Dre is too busy attending fashion shows put on by the Pussycat Dolls. [When he ain't busy hittin them weights of course.]
IDOLATOR: Back To The Skanky Dance Troupe With You, Nicole
"I just wanna fuckwitchu, on the sneak tip, on some creep shit, so whatcha gon' do, ya freak bitch?
It's main architect, Dr. Dre is too busy attending fashion shows put on by the Pussycat Dolls. [When he ain't busy hittin them weights of course.]
You got yr cherry bomb?
FILE UNDER: Video of the Day!
Cause seriously, you should have gotten your hands on this one by now.
Earlier...
One-A-Day! Tauwan's Top 25 Albums of 2007! - SEVEN/GA GA GA GA GA/SPOON
Cause seriously, you should have gotten your hands on this one by now.
Earlier...
Saturday, March 15, 2008
Old School Funk for the True Funk Soldiers!
The other day Pajiba had a fun little Afternoon Comment Diversion. The rules were simple. Grab your iPod, press shuffle, and write down the first five songs that come on. Now the music on my iPod is varied as all hell, but I must say I was truly surprised when I hit shuffle and was hit with "BAPTIZE THE FUNK". Yeah that's right, Da Brat's Funkdafied. That shit was hilarious, and a pleasant surprise. It had been a while. But you know what would have been even funnier? If I were to press play, and been presented with this Da Brat song:
Now THAT'S the jam!
[Oh and if you're curious, the rest of my top five was 2. "One More Time/Aerodynamnic" [live] - Daft Punk, 3. "The Work Pt. 1" - Prince, 4. "Cannon" - The White Stripes, and 5. "Roxanne" - The Police]
PAJIBA: Five Songs II
Now THAT'S the jam!
[Oh and if you're curious, the rest of my top five was 2. "One More Time/Aerodynamnic" [live] - Daft Punk, 3. "The Work Pt. 1" - Prince, 4. "Cannon" - The White Stripes, and 5. "Roxanne" - The Police]
I will hunt you down.
Don't forget to set your tivos. Tonight. SNL. Mariah Carey. Stepping in for Janet Jackson, who's sick with the flu. Host Jonah Hill. Cause who doesn't want to see the song presented above performed live. Said performance is sure to include an ill-fitting and inappropriate clothing choice, and lots of emoting via the snap of her head and the lifting of her fingers towards the heavens.
Friday, March 14, 2008
For Your Consideration.
The Roots. Rising Down. In stores Tuesday, April 29th. Act like you know.
Earlier...
AND
Can't knock the hustle.
FILE UNDER: For Your Consideration.
QUESTION: Did you see how Justin dissed her when he was inducting Madonna into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. Low class.
Damn it Britney!
That was the first thing that came to my mind when I heard that Madonna would be granted admission into the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame. This shit would have been monumental. Madonna's gonna perform, I thought, OR one or the many pop princesses would get up there and tear the roof off the sucka! Or maybe they'd perform a medley of some sort and have everyone on their feet; One nation under a groove, all marching to the beat of Madonna's drums.
But no, none of the above.
Strike 1: Madonna ain't performing!
Strike 2: Justin Timberlake [who I am completely and utterly convinced is an asshole, no matter how much I enjoy his music] will be inducting her?
Strike 3: Iggy & the Stooges will be performing in her honor. (?)
What. (?)
The. (?)
Fuck. (?)
This is not the way it's supposed to be.
And then I calmed the fuck down and thought about things for a minute. And you know what? Madonna, I ain't mad at cha.
Yes you're being inducted into the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame, but you also got an album to promote. It's lead single features Mr. Timberlake, so okay, I see you. And having a [once?] badass punk band perform two of your songs, two songs, it must be said, though popular, are arguably not your most recognizable/well known singles or songs? Pretty bad ass.
Look, this your job. Many people stop and go, "ho sit down", or "go sit still." But you don't, and you can't, and won't, and every two years there you are, new album in tow, grabbing our attention, latching on to a trend, staying the course, and somehow locking us in, just like you did two years before that, and two years before that, and the two years before that, and so on, and so on.
So keep on, keep, keepin on. I'm curious to hear this new Timbo/JT ish. Hopefully it'll bring Loose like success, and keep you away from any Red Carpet Massacres.
QUESTION: Did you see how Justin dissed her when he was inducting Madonna into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. Low class.
Damn it Britney!
That was the first thing that came to my mind when I heard that Madonna would be granted admission into the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame. This shit would have been monumental. Madonna's gonna perform, I thought, OR one or the many pop princesses would get up there and tear the roof off the sucka! Or maybe they'd perform a medley of some sort and have everyone on their feet; One nation under a groove, all marching to the beat of Madonna's drums.
But no, none of the above.
Strike 1: Madonna ain't performing!
Strike 2: Justin Timberlake [who I am completely and utterly convinced is an asshole, no matter how much I enjoy his music] will be inducting her?
Strike 3: Iggy & the Stooges will be performing in her honor. (?)
What. (?)
The. (?)
Fuck. (?)
This is not the way it's supposed to be.
And then I calmed the fuck down and thought about things for a minute. And you know what? Madonna, I ain't mad at cha.
Yes you're being inducted into the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame, but you also got an album to promote. It's lead single features Mr. Timberlake, so okay, I see you. And having a [once?] badass punk band perform two of your songs, two songs, it must be said, though popular, are arguably not your most recognizable/well known singles or songs? Pretty bad ass.
Look, this your job. Many people stop and go, "ho sit down", or "go sit still." But you don't, and you can't, and won't, and every two years there you are, new album in tow, grabbing our attention, latching on to a trend, staying the course, and somehow locking us in, just like you did two years before that, and two years before that, and the two years before that, and so on, and so on.
So keep on, keep, keepin on. I'm curious to hear this new Timbo/JT ish. Hopefully it'll bring Loose like success, and keep you away from any Red Carpet Massacres.
Thursday, March 13, 2008
Old School Funk for the True Funk Soldiers!
The beautiful ones.
I remember it like it was yesterday...
Winter 1998. Horace Mann Middle School. South Central, Los Angeles. Darryl, as a joke, bought his cousin [and my then partner in crime] Jajuane a copy of Marilyn Manson's album Mechanical Animals for X-Mas. Darryl thought it was jokes.
[I mean seriously, look at that cover. Imagine unwrapping your gift expecting The Miseducation Of Lauryn Hill, Vol. 2, Hard Knock Life, Enter the Dru, or any other album all the youngins in the hood had to have at the time, and being hit with this.]
Jajuane, of course, had to get rid of this shit. So what did he do? He passed it on to his buddy with a taste for music that went beyond just hip-hop and R&B; Me.
And from that moment on, I became a full fledged Marilyn Manson fan. I mean read the autobiography, defended him in conversations, smiled with delight when he appeared in Bowling for Columbine, own purchased copies of every album since Mechanical Animals [including his latest Eat Me, Drink Me]fan.
And that is why, during my post work workout I got pumped to this song presented below Cause every now and then, I need a little Marilyn Manson in my life.
Yeah, I said it.
NEXT WEEK: my unhealthy late teenage fascination with the Gallagher bros...
Earlier...
One.
FILE UNDER: Oh Word?
What you say n**a? Amnesia?#@*!
Okay. So at first, the title to this news blurb alone was enough to make me chuckle and go, oh Snoop:
Snoop Dogg to perform on ‘One Life to Live’
And then I kept reading and was hit with this quote:
“My momma always had it on the tube in tha crib growing up. The opportunity to change up the theme song and give it some of my flavor will make the show the Life of The Party.”
Yes, I realize Snoop ain't the only Black male on the planet who watched stories in his childhood cause his moms was bout it, bout it. No, look again. MSNBC took it upon themselves to write said quote how Snoop talks. Look at the word in between "in" and "crib", it's tha, not the, but tha. That's straight jokes MSNBC. Straight jokes...
MSNBC: Snoop Dogg to perform on ‘One Life to Live’
What you say n**a? Amnesia?#@*!
Okay. So at first, the title to this news blurb alone was enough to make me chuckle and go, oh Snoop:
Snoop Dogg to perform on ‘One Life to Live’
And then I kept reading and was hit with this quote:
“My momma always had it on the tube in tha crib growing up. The opportunity to change up the theme song and give it some of my flavor will make the show the Life of The Party.”
Yes, I realize Snoop ain't the only Black male on the planet who watched stories in his childhood cause his moms was bout it, bout it. No, look again. MSNBC took it upon themselves to write said quote how Snoop talks. Look at the word in between "in" and "crib", it's tha, not the, but tha. That's straight jokes MSNBC. Straight jokes...
Wednesday, March 12, 2008
IT'S THE YAK! [Redux]
FILE UNDER: New flava in ya ear!
Lil Wayne, Lil Wayne, Lil Wayne. As of late I have been loving your musical output to death, but I, like many a Lil Wayne fan, sure would love to hear that Tha Carter III album right about now. [That shit's been pushed back more times than Nicole Scherzinger's solo disc.] But hey, no rush. Take your time, do it right. Come with those off the wall lyrics, cosmic, ass shaking beats, and of course, some hooks, cause many of us are still waiting to so see and want to know if you can indeed deliver what many in the game call a "hit single." Will this be it? I don't know. We the people love us some T-Pain, and Sensual Seduction was a good hit for a minute, but for you, this is a bold move. Coming at us on the first go round with some more Leather So Soft yak/weed induced ramblin man shit, and less I Can't Feel My Face/We Takin Over freestyle from Da Drought 3 craziness. A good look when so much seems to be on the line? Let's find out.
Lil Wayne feat. Static Major. Lollipop.
Lil Wayne, Lil Wayne, Lil Wayne. As of late I have been loving your musical output to death, but I, like many a Lil Wayne fan, sure would love to hear that Tha Carter III album right about now. [That shit's been pushed back more times than Nicole Scherzinger's solo disc.] But hey, no rush. Take your time, do it right. Come with those off the wall lyrics, cosmic, ass shaking beats, and of course, some hooks, cause many of us are still waiting to so see and want to know if you can indeed deliver what many in the game call a "hit single." Will this be it? I don't know. We the people love us some T-Pain, and Sensual Seduction was a good hit for a minute, but for you, this is a bold move. Coming at us on the first go round with some more Leather So Soft yak/weed induced ramblin man shit, and less I Can't Feel My Face/We Takin Over freestyle from Da Drought 3 craziness. A good look when so much seems to be on the line? Let's find out.
Lil Wayne feat. Static Major. Lollipop.
Leave (Get Out)
Uh, let's see. Aeon Flux. Sailor Moon. Pokemon. Dragonball Z. Fan made anime video set to a Britney track...
New Britney Spears video for one of the better songs on a strong album her label wishes she would promote more?
Nah, get the fuck outta here with that nonsense.
No, seriously. Get. The fuck. Out.
New Britney Spears video for one of the better songs on a strong album her label wishes she would promote more?
Nah, get the fuck outta here with that nonsense.
No, seriously. Get. The fuck. Out.
Rock Lobster.
I don't know, maybe I'm biased or something, seeing as how I don't particularly care for the music of the Daughtrys and Nickelbacks of the world, but unlike the judges and audience in attendance, this performance did nothing for me.
Purple Kisses.
Go let it out?
Oh the internet. For many, the internet is a sort of home away from home; a refuge where one can say things, do things, and view things that they never would in the real world. And anonymity is often CLUTCH. For example, are you a guy who like boys but doesn't want anyone to know? It's all to the good. Hop on craigslist, visit a gay porn site, join a "in the closet" message board, blog about being in the closet, etc., etc. Nobody will ever know, unless, you take MTV up on this wonderful offer:
Want to be on MTV?
"I Live Another Life on the Web" will feature profiles of people, from varied backgrounds, leading alternate lives online. Is what you do secret? Are you "out of the closet" online, but "in the closet" in real life? If you are between the ages of 18 and 30, and fit what MTV's looking for [always with the looks, this one], email us at: mtvtruelife@gay.com with your story. Please be sure to include your name, location, phone number and a photo, if possible..."
Really MTV? Really? Yeah...I don't know dawg. I know it's 2008 and all, but this one just seems like it'll be difficult to cast.
Tuesday, March 11, 2008
Riddle Me This?
Is it wrong that I like this photo of Danity Kane?
I know, I know, it's a re-hash of a re-hash [Britney Spears. Esquire Magazine cover. November 2002. Also an homage to the shot made famous by Ms. Angie Dickinson.]And one or two of the girls have seemed to forgotten that this is a GROUP photo, but still, I like it.
BONUS:
New Danity Kane!
Damaged.
Dream is that you?
Naw, I'm just playing. Nothing but love ladies. But I swear man, everybody and they mama trying to get up on that European Club/House music vibe right now. Janet, Rihanna, Usher, these ladies. Who's next?
Pic spotted over atCrunk + Disorderly.
I know, I know, it's a re-hash of a re-hash [Britney Spears. Esquire Magazine cover. November 2002. Also an homage to the shot made famous by Ms. Angie Dickinson.]And one or two of the girls have seemed to forgotten that this is a GROUP photo, but still, I like it.
BONUS:
New Danity Kane!
Damaged.
Dream is that you?
Naw, I'm just playing. Nothing but love ladies. But I swear man, everybody and they mama trying to get up on that European Club/House music vibe right now. Janet, Rihanna, Usher, these ladies. Who's next?
Pic spotted over at
I'm sorry...
2008...
For Bill, Eliot, Mark, and Larry.
"AFTER DEATH AND TAXES, the next surest thing is that the discovery of sexual misbehavior by a public figure will be instantly followed -- as New York Gov. Eliot Spitzer is merely the latest to confirm -- by a public apology: " ... so sorry ... deeply sorry ... profoundly sorry. ... "Of course they're sorry! They're sorry they got caught, and now the fun has to stop, and they're being publicly humiliated, and their spouses have to stand up there grimacing -- think about how hard it must be to be forgiven for that -- and on top of that they might even lose their jobs. Who wouldn't experience pangs of regret?"
LOS ANGELES TIMES: A sorry lot, indeed: It's getting caught, not what they did, that they regret the most.
For Bill, Eliot, Mark, and Larry.
"AFTER DEATH AND TAXES, the next surest thing is that the discovery of sexual misbehavior by a public figure will be instantly followed -- as New York Gov. Eliot Spitzer is merely the latest to confirm -- by a public apology: " ... so sorry ... deeply sorry ... profoundly sorry. ... "Of course they're sorry! They're sorry they got caught, and now the fun has to stop, and they're being publicly humiliated, and their spouses have to stand up there grimacing -- think about how hard it must be to be forgiven for that -- and on top of that they might even lose their jobs. Who wouldn't experience pangs of regret?"
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